Sunday, January 17, 2010

Open hearts

Our book club this month is reading a book by Virginia H. Pearce titled A Heart Like His. When I first looked at it, my thoughts were "I'll try, but I won't like it". It isn't that I don't like spiritually uplifting literature, it is just that I have never done well with lectures. I have a hard time listening in classes, of all types, even though I want the knowledge offered. I constantly find my mind wandering to all sorts of other things. This is true with lecture type books also. I read the same page 5 times and the knowledge still won't sink in. I get it for that minute, but by the time I've read the next page, it is all forgotten. I am the type of person who needs a story to follow. I love history, but hate history books! I do, however, enjoy historical fiction. I get the history, but I also have a storyline to follow.

Back to my book club book. I got it today in church, and glanced at it briefly, then put it away in my bag. While my kids were playing video games tonight, I dug it out thinking that I might as well get a start on it, considering that it was going to take me all month to get through the 106 pages (in a normal book, that would take me maybe two hours). An hour later, I was already to page 71! I am so excited! Not only am I remembering the things that I have read, they are already making a huge impact on my life.
I have spent the last 2 and a half years in a horrible place. I have to convince myself everyday that it is a good idea just to be alive. Though I try not to live in a pity party by myself, it has been extremely hard. I love my family more than anything. They are like a drug to me. I am literally addicted to my children. Yes, they make me crazy everyday, but it makes me more crazy to be without them. Because of the loss of one of my choicest "drugs" I have felt like it will never be possible to be completely happy again. I am tired, irritable, and I am sure that I am just a joy to be around!

I know that everyone has their own trials, but it is hard for me to see that anyone could possibly suffer more than me. My feelings have put strains on all of my relationships. I am sure that I have pushed more than one friend away because of my "hard heart". As I have read this book, it has brought me some great insight. At one point, the author asks "Are you feeling the love of God - that He loves you, personally?" My answer has to be no. I have felt terribly abandoned. My hard heart has closed me off to the feelings of love that my Father in Heaven, I am sure, is trying to get to me. How do I change this? The whole idea of the book is that if we open our hearts, soften them, to the people around us, we will not only help them feel Gods love in their lives, but also in our own.
Sister Pearce states that when we feel His love, we feel "Acknowledged, accepted, validated, noticed, cared for, supported, encouraged, uplifted, motivated, inspired, comforted, HEALED, nourished, nurtured, changed, more confident, more able." Isn't this what we all want from life? To feel these things? If I can help someone else receive these feelings in their lives, will it really help me feel them? This is all I have ever wanted! I NEED to feel His love for me, with out it, I can't feel any other love for me. I am going to try to ignore my selfish impulses, and do my best to open my heart. I may be able to save some lives in the process, mine included.

Friday, January 15, 2010

Geocaching

On one of the rare occasions when Ryan was home, we decided to find something fun to do with the kids. We had heard about geocaching, and decided to give it a try. We found a few locations around our home. The first one was at Yuba Lake. It had a bunch of great prizes for the kids.

Here we are at our first found Geocache.


Here is the box and all of the awesome prizes!

One of the caches was clear up on top of the mountain. We hiked the last few hundred feet. This is the view that we got!


We had a really fun time and have been able to go a few more times. It is a really fun activity to do with kids!

Mozart

Every so often, I am graced by the beautiful sounds of piano music wafting through the house! It always makes me smile!

Besides being a musical prodigy, she is always willing to help around the house when ever possible (whether we want her to or not!)



Thursday, January 14, 2010

Branden's 9th Birthday

Yes, I am a horrible mom, I didn't post about Branden on his birthday! So, let's hop into the way-back machine and return to September 11th. Branden had told his friends that he was going to have a birthday party, and I didn't want to make a liar out of him, so I let him have a few of his best buddies over for a pizza and movie sleepover. He asked for a chocolate cake with chocolate frosting again, but this year he wanted Darth Vader on it. This is what I came up with.

He was pretty impressed. I let him think that I drew that free hand from a picture I found on the Internet! It turned out perfect for him!

As always, Keira was there to steal all of the attention!

Over all, it was a pretty fun night for the boys. Now it is bragging time! Branden is such a great helper. He is always helping me with Keira, and with cooking, and sometimes even with cleaning! He is so handsome, and almost as tall as me. I'll be surprised if I am still taller than him by his next birthday! I really love him!





Sleeping Beauties!

So, sometimes Keira likes to fight us on taking a nap, and Ryan likes to snuggle her (or force her into submission!) to sleep. One day after I realize that she was no longer fighting him, I looked over and this is what I saw. Soo funny! Notice that they are laying the EXACT same way! Ryan hates when I take pictures like this, but obviously, I'm in charge not him!


Branden the WOLF!


I am so proud of my friend Branden. He is such a great kid when he wants to be! On Aug 26th he received his wolf in cub scouting. He was so excited! He really loves scouts, and can't wait till he is able to go on camp outs as a real boy scout!

Monday, January 11, 2010

Hey mom, Look what I can do!

This was taken before she could walk. I looked into Ashton's room and this is what I saw! She would climb up and then sit there and yell till someone came to help her slide down. She can do it herself now, just like an old pro!

Keira's Birthday!

You would never guess that our baby is the only girl! She loved every minute of attention she got on her birthday! This is the cake that we made for her to demolish. Really, all she did was tear it to pieces and throw it in her lap! She hardly ate any of it, which surprised me considering how much she loves chocolate!



We met Grandma and Grandpa at the park for pizza and cake, but the most important thing was the presents! She got a new baby doll and a princess phone from grandma and grandpa, and loved them.


This is the end product of all of my hard work! It is so funny how different babies deal with their own cake! What a mess! I am glad that it was a mess at the park! The birds cleaned up, not me!


From us she got a fun little bike that has songs, numbers and letters. She is still playing on it a few times a day, so I guess it was a good purchase! Yes, that is Christmas wrapping paper!


This is Gabriel on his first birthday, it just reminded me of the next picture of Keira. They must be related!

What beautiful babies I have!

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

1st day of school

This year was a huge mile stone for me, and the boys. They all got up to go to school! It was a little weird when they all left the house and it was just the girls left! I can't believe how fast they grow up and move on. It is all just wrong if you ask me! Here are my little goof balls ready to walk out the door for their first day of school for the 09/10 school year.
Here they are riding their scooters to the bus stop at the end of the block.


Ashton getting off of the bus at the end of his first day. He had a great time and has been a great student (according to his teacher who must have more patience than me!).

YUBA!

Our friends, and next door neighbors, invited us to go spend the afternoon with them at Yuba lake. Seriously, why don't we spend every day during the summer there? It is only about 10 minutes away! We must not be so smart!


Here is Ashton and Justin floating around.
Jace watering the sand, just in case it was thirsty, I'm sure!

Branden and his friend Jory (this was Jory's first time at a lake) having a super time!
All in all, we had a great time, even with the afternoon wind and sand storm! Good times had by all!


July 24th

The 24th of July gets quite the notice here in our one horse town. It is a pretty big celebration! This year, my great friend Krista came and spent the night with us so that she and her adorable boys could celebrate with us! My sister in law also came down with her kids to join in the festivities. The fun starts off with a children's parade, followed by a big lunch and dinner in the park, bouncy houses that our friend Jason brings, a movie the previous night on a super big screen in the park, and we top it all off with a great fireworks show!
Because daddy is a fireman, and grandpa is the chief, the kids get to ride on the fire engine and throw candy, They love it!
Branden got to march with the flag this time with his scout troop. He is getting so big!
Krista and her Cutie-patooties, Daniel and Isaac, watching fireworks.
Isaac was obsessed with kissing Keira every time she was within reach! Soo cute!
It got old! What a curse beauty is!

Wax on, Wax off, Daniel San!

In the middle of July, we invited ourselves to go to Fish Lake with my parents. I love Fish Lake. It is one of those places that our family frequented when I was a child. I remember that we always camped in the same group site, and us kids did some of the craziest crap! Seriously, where were our parents? Anywho, I am glad that I am now able to indoctrinate my children to believe that this is one of the greatest places ever to go camping! I know, I am a great mother! As the boys wandered into the lake at the beginning of a lightning storm, I decided to get a little nostalgic on them. They have no idea why they had to stand like that in the middle of the lake so that I could take pictures! It still cracks me up! I am easily entertained!

Branden doing his best Daniel San impression!

Ashton just about to fall into the freezing cold water! His balance must not be so great yet!

Jace almost balancing on the cold rock!


Acting in true boy fashion, trying to freeze their little tooshes off!

Birds and Bikes

This summer, we went for a few bike rides as a family. Most were just around town, but one Saturday, we went up to Bridal Veil Falls in Provo. We started just below the falls, and rode up to them and let the kids play, then continued up to the park where the Heber Creeper starts (I can't remember the name!) and had a picnic then rode back down to the car. In all we guessed that it was about 3 miles round trip. Quite an accomplishment for the kids with half of it up hill! Stupid me, left the camera in the car! So this is the only picture I have of the whole trip. This is how Keira ended up! The cooler was where her feet should have been, so she was stretched across the seat (which she hated). Poor baby! I really tried to make her more comfortable with the blanket, but she wouldn't lean that way! We have plans to do much more biking and hiking this next summer. Anyone up for the back side of Mt Nebo?

I got to go with Branden to Tracy Aviary for the 2nd grade field trip at the end of last year (yes, I really am that far behind!) It was fun to spend the day with him!


This was the biggest, creepiest bird I have ever seen! Seriously, the picture does it no justice!

This bird was part of the bird show. It was fetching raw meat here!





Baseball and long grass!

We put the boys into coach pitch baseball this summer. They had a great time (except when Jace didn't want to put any physical effort into playing, typical Jace). I am a horrible mom, and forgot to take any pictures of Ashton. He was in T-ball this year, and loved every second of it! His team was the Angels, and he was so cute trying to field the balls!
Branden and Jace were on the same team, which included all the kids from our town, The Rockies. Here is Jace batting. It took him a while, but he got the hang of it eventually!
Branden batting.
The "little sluggers" all tuckered out after a long game in the sun!

Jace in the out field..... What? What ball?




Branden playing catcher. The equipment was too big for him, so he opted out of the leg stuff!



Getting ready to throw the ball back to the coach.


A few times this summer, the lawn got a little longer than it should have. We decided to play a game for FHE, and Ryan mowed a kickball diamond in the grass. Grandma and Grandpa even came to play with us. It was a lot of fun! This isn't the picture of the diamond, but the grass was about the same length as it is in this picture.

Playing catch-up!

So, Here I am, feeling stupid because I am so far behind! Here is my excuse....

I have recently rediscovered reading. I have always loved reading, but kids, and a household had distracted me for the last 9 years. My new found fun started with the combination of our ward book group mixed with my good friend Jason writing his own gem. I was able to talk Jason into letting me read his rough draft (he didn't however tell me that it wasn't complete!). I really enjoyed not only the story, but the act of reading something with substance (not a free parenting magazine article). The ward book group was reading a book that I thought sounded interesting, so I joined. I read both things really quickly, and soon felt bored. I forgot about TV, and housework started to suffer (who needs a clean house?). I needed more books! So, for the last 4 or 5 months, I have made frequent use of the county bookmobile service (no library in our little town!) each time taking several novels for me along with audio books for Ryan and children's stories for the kids. Needless to say, I end up with a large armload of new books every other week for my family to enjoy! I have been able to read many books that I have wanted to try out for years, and some new ones that I would never recommend to anyone! Branden has caught the fever, and has read the first three Harry Potter books and is starting on the fourth. I am reading them with him, and when we finish one, we watch the movie. It has been fun for me to see the excitement he has when he finishes a large book. He is only 9, and is usually not so confident in his abilities. I love that he feels good about himself when he reads. Jace has also started "reading" Harry Potter. He says that he is reading them, and he is capable of it, but I think that he is not quite ready emotionally to deal with such a drawn out story. He tells me one morning that he is on chapter 3, and by the end of school, he's on chapter 19! Unfortunately, I know that he is not given enough time in school to read quite that much in one day. Oh well! When he's ready, I'll be there to help! Anywho! That is my excuse! The suffering of my blog was one of the unfortunate downfalls of my reading addiction! In fact, the bookmobile took a month off for Christmas, and I ran out of things to read, that is probably the only reason this is being posted!
By the way, Jason, I am still waiting on the edge of my seat for the ending of that book!


Now for the catch up!
This was at the school playground next to Tayna's house in Draper, kind-of old, but I thought it was a cute picture of my little ones!